Mood Journal Day...uh

I had an interesting conversation yesterday with a friend. This is the same friend that I've mentioned before, the musician, the one who has known me for a very long time.

Our relationship is very interesting in the way that we've known each other since childhood. But unlike most people who were childhood friends, we had a 'break' for a couple of years and reconnected when we were both a little more jaded, harder, wary of...I want to say relationships but that's not really the correct word, I guess I should just say of people in general.

Now for those who don't have childhood friends, let me explain to you how it feels to have one: childhood friends are like time travelling machines, you can be 100 years old but once you see them, you are 6, 10, 14, 17 years old again. They are a part of you, they are what makes you, they are yours and you are theirs in a way that a child will call a toy theirs and only theirs. And for better or worse, you can't stop feeling like that child you were when you are with them. 

--because of the 'break' we had, we see each other, at least I do as before and after. I still remember the boy who grew up with me...but meeting him again, I see a different side to him; the man. So, it's like meeting this person who is a familiar stranger, if you know what I mean.

Now he has a wife and kid.

I'm still single and yes, no kid (do pets count?).

But surprisingly we're still walking on the same path; trying to make our dreams come true and trying to overcome the problems and consequences that comes from doing that.

Anyway, I was talking to him about this song that I could seriously relate to. A song that pretty much conveys what I feel when I sit down with my friends who are successful in their jobs, making big bucks, having their own families...people who are living lives in a completely different way from me.

A life, that I know, is just not for me.

Usually, when I say this, my friends get all in my face, either sympathetic, disbelief, or in pity. It pisses me off, of course.

But then, this friend, this old friend pointed out some things that make me think. He is good for that. Sometimes, we serve as either a trashcan or a sounding board for each other.

And then he said something, said that I taught him how to look at both sides of the argument.

And that made me feel good, that I, being myself, taught him something that he actually applied to his life--and mine. That I had a part of making him to the person that he is now; someone who is smart, generous, conscientious, caring and insightful.

This is why you need to surround yourself with good people, 'cause when you are down, they will remind you of the good in you.

That when you can't see the good qualities in yourself, you will find it in your friends.